Tuesday, December 11, 2007

should i feel like crap about what happened on sunday? i'm not talking about stupid stuff, but the other stuff, as not all of this applies to stupid stuff, in fact much probably doesn't.

am i feeling crappy because i feel that i'm expected to feel crappy, by her? it's a tricky and very vulnerable question but i think i might make myself feel crappy because of that. there's two potential/likely flaws here. (a) she might not want me to feel crappy because of this. after all it was pleasant and went deep, despite being wrong. maybe feeling crappy is unloving, hurtful. it's definitely hurtful to me cause i feel that it's wrong to feel crappy about it. it was wrong and we should walk away from sin, but feeling crappy for her might be just as wrong as the actual thing that happened. (b) sin has to be brought to God. i've been trying to do that but i think the thing that really hinders me is my wrong/forced attitude about (a).

confusing thoughts in fairly cryptic language...

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